Writing Improvement Exercise: Revising for Overall Conciseness
Revise the following to be simple, clear, concise, and conversational.
a. Please be advised that it is our intention to make every effort to deliver your order by the date of your request, December 1.
b. There is an e-mail policy within our organization that makes a statement that management may access and monitor the e-mail activity of each and every employee.
c. Due to the fact that e-mail is a valuable tool in business, we in management are pleased to make e-mail available to all employees who are authorized to use it.
d. Whether or not we make a continuation of the sales campaign is dependent upon its success in the city of St. Louis.
e. It is our suggestion that you do not attempt to move forward until you seek and obtain approval of the plan from the team leader prior to beginning this project.